Welcome to Reema Ayub's Writings

Every human possesses a unique skill that can become their foundation for earning a living. Skills are not just talents; they are learned abilities that allow individuals to contribute to society, regardless of their physical or mental conditions. A disability does not equate to inability—this is a fundamental truth that has shaped progressive policies worldwide, especially in the United States. The American Perspective: ADA and Workplace Inclusion The concept of inclusivity for individuals with disabilities gained strong momentum in the United States through the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA). Enacted in 1990, the ADA prohibits discrimination against people with disabilities in various areas, including employment, education, and public services. This act ensures that individuals are judged based on their skills and capabilities rather than their medical conditions. Many American companies follow these guidelines strictly, offering accommodations, flexible work environments, and...

Have you ever felt a weight in your chest, a tightness in your stomach, or a restlessness in your mind? Suppressed emotions don’t disappear—they settle in the body, often surfacing as stress, anxiety, or even physical pain. This is where catharsis becomes essential. In psychology, catharsis refers to the process of releasing pent-up emotions to achieve emotional relief. Think of it as an emotional detox—if you don’t let it out, it stays inside, causing discomfort. Pay attention to how you talk about people and experiences in your mind. Do you bottle up frustration, replay conversations, or silently hold onto pain? Finding your natural way of expression can lead to a healthier emotional state. Ways to Cathartically Release Emotions: 1. Writing – Journaling or blogging helps structure thoughts and unload emotions. 2. Speaking – Whether through therapy, a trusted friend, or self-talk, verbalizing emotions provides clarity. 3. Creative Expression – Art, music, poetry, or movement can be po...

Trauma is not just an event; it is a wound that seeps into every corner of the soul, shaping personalities, relationships, and even the way one perceives love and trust. Many people believe that personality is a matter of choice, but for those who have lived through domestic violence, betrayal, and abuse, personality often becomes a reflection of survival. When a child witnesses violence at home, their first understanding of love is not warmth—it is fear. Their first understanding of relationships is not trust—it is betrayal. The mind, still tender and forming, absorbs these experiences like ink in water, staining every future connection with a deep-rooted sense of caution. A person who has seen violence in their home is more likely to attract or endure further harm. The trauma does not end when the physical wounds heal; instead, it manifests in other painful experiences—manipulative friendships, sexual abuse, emotional isolation, and self-doubt. It becomes a cycle, where one betrayal ...

In societies where physical illnesses like kidney stones are met with sympathy but mental health conditions lead to exclusion, we see a fundamental misunderstanding of human well-being. In Pakistan, for instance, an individual diagnosed with a kidney stone receives support, while someone struggling with a mental health disorder risks being socially or professionally sidelined. Contrast this with American multinational companies operating in Pakistan—they recognize that mental health struggles like anxiety or depression do not inherently hinder productivity or creativity. Instead, they provide mental health allowances, acknowledging that meaningful work can play a crucial role in recovery. This reflects a more informed and science-backed approach: mental health conditions are not just barriers but challenges that, when managed correctly, allow individuals to thrive. Unfortunately, in less educated circles, the misconception persists that disorders like ADHD or depression require mere ...

She was never wanted. Not from the moment she took her first breath, not in the eyes of the woman who birthed her. Her mother, instead of cradling her with love, had always looked at her with resentment. Resentment that turned into hatred, hatred that turned into violence. A slap for being too loud. A kick for being too weak. A beating for simply existing. Her mother's sister—her aunt—was no different. If anything, she was worse. She saw the little girl as an inconvenience, an extra mouth to feed, a reminder of something she could never understand. Instead of protecting her, she joined in the punishment. Every bruise on the child's skin became a silent scream, an unspoken plea: Why am I here if no one wants me? They never told her what was right, only what was wrong. They never taught her values, only fed her lies. They planted seeds of corruption in her mind, not because she was corrupt, but because they wanted the world to see her that way. And the world did. The night that c...

She should have seen it coming. The signs were always there—small, insidious warnings disguised as professionalism. The cold stares. The whispered judgments. The way her words were twisted, repackaged with meanings she never intended. But she ignored them, because she was just being herself—original, unfiltered, and true. And then, one day, boom. Fired. Not for incompetence. Not for negligence. But for authenticity. For speaking in a way that didn’t fit their narrow mold. For using words that were innocent in her mind but dangerous in theirs. They sat her down, handed her the verdict, and expected devastation. But they were wrong. Because instead of despair, she felt an unshakable sense of freedom. A strange, exhilarating lightness. It was as if she had been suffocating in a room she didn’t even realize was locked, and now, suddenly, the doors were flung open. She walked out, not as a defeated woman, but as someone who had just been handed her escape. Ironically, she had been preparing...

In a world obsessed with authenticity, it is ironic how the original ones suffer the most. Social media preaches “Be yourself, and the world will adjust,” but does it really? If that were true, why do the genuine ones often find themselves outcasted, misunderstood, and sidelined—at home, in workplaces, and within their own families? The world has always had a bias for the polished over the raw. That’s why dishes are decorated before being served. No one wants to see the chaos of preparation, the splattered oil, the burned edges—the true process of creation. Instead, they want the illusion of perfection, even if it’s just for show. The same principle applies to people. At work, the polished worker—the one who fits the mold, smiles at the right time, and knows how to decorate their words—is preferred. Even if another worker is more hardworking, more authentic, and truly dedicated, they are often overlooked because their truth lacks packaging. Their rawness makes others uncomfortable. At ...

Cold calling is often perceived as a challenging and outdated sales technique. However, for those who master it, cold calling is not just about selling—it’s about human connection, relationships, and meaningful conversations. In my experience, cold calling is the most cost-effective yet rewarding sales strategy. It requires nothing but a phone, confidence, and resilience. Unlike digital ads or paid promotions, cold calling demands a personal touch—engaging directly with potential customers, understanding their needs, and building trust. Of course, not every call results in a sale. Some prospects will decline, and some will say they’re not interested. But the true art of cold calling lies in perseverance. If three calls end in rejection, the fourth might be the one that says, “Yes, tell me more—what’s the price?” A great cold caller does not take rejection personally. Instead, they see it as part of the journey. Every "no" brings them one step closer to a "yes." The ...

Adulthood is not just about age—it is about understanding humans. It is the stage where you finally see through the masks people wear, where you realize that kindness is not just a virtue but a necessity. Every human craves validation, seeks superiority, and wants to feel important. Carl Jung put it aptly—life is a constant struggle for priority. Have you ever noticed how even the simplest debates turn into battles of ego? The winner walks away feeling triumphant as if they have won a grand prize, while the loser carries an unspoken wound. When I understood this, I stopped debating. I learned to simply say, "Yes," "You're right," "Okay fine," and move on. Because why waste energy explaining something to someone who lacks the capacity or willingness to understand? Knowledge is not for display—it is for personal growth. The Faces People Wear People are double-faced. It is not pessimism; it is reality. A person who is a friend to everyone is a friend ...

A woman's dignity is not defined by her marital status. A widow has dignity. A non virgin has dignity. A woman who has suffered sexual abuses has dignity. A woman who does not meet society’s superficial standards of desirability has dignity. A woman—whether she is 28 or 38—deserves respect and autonomy over her own body. Yet, in workplaces, in public spaces, and even in homes, many aged women are treated as though they are disposable. If she has lost something in life—whether it be her youth, her beauty, or her supposed "purity"—society discards her, leaving her vulnerable to harassment and exploitation. In many places, particularly in Pakistan, women who are past their youth face systemic dehumanization. Their original documents are taken from them—whether by employers or institutions—leaving them without the power to move forward in life. The C.E.O does not respect her. The manager does not respect her. The sweeper does not respect her. No one respect her. Because she i...

ਜਿਹੜਾ ਪੰਜਾਬੀ ਬੋਲਦਾ, ਪੜ੍ਹਦਾ, ਲਿਖਦਾ ਹੈ – ਓਹੀ ਅਸਲ ਵਿੱਚ ਪੰਜਾਬ ਦੀ ਸ਼ਾਨ ਹੈ! ਅਸੀਂ ਕੋਈ ਮੂਰਖ ਗ਼ੁਲਾਮ ਨਹੀਂ, ਅਸੀਂ ਪੰਜਾਬ ਦੇ ਵਾਸੀ ਹਾਂ, ਸਾਡੀ ਆਪਣੀ ਇੱਕ ਸ਼ਨਾਖਤ ਹੈ, ਇੱਕ ਤਰੀਕ, ਇੱਕ ਤਕਰੀਰ। ਅਸੀਂ ਕੌਣ ਹਾਂ? ਅੱਲਾਹ ਪਾਕ ਨੇ ਆਪ ਕੁਰਾਨ ਵਿੱਚ ਫਰਮਾਇਆ – "ਮੈਂ ਤੁਹਾਨੂੰ ਜਾਤ, ਪਾਤ ਵਿੱਚ ਤਾਂ ਤਕਸੀਮ ਕੀਤਾ ਤਾਂਕਿ ਤੁਸੀਂ ਆਪਣੀ ਸ਼ਨਾਖਤ ਕਰ ਸਕੋ।" ਤੇ ਜੇਕਰ ਮੈਂ ਆਪਣੀ ਹੀ ਸ਼ਨਾਖਤ ਨੂੰ ਨਾ ਮੰਨਾਂ, ਆਪਣੀ ਮਾਂ ਬੋਲੀ ਨੂੰ ਛੱਡ ਦਿਆਂ, ਆਪਣੀ ਧਰਤੀ ਤੋਂ ਪਿਆਰ ਨਾ ਕਰਾਂ – ਤਾਂ ਮੇਰੀ ਹੋਂਦ ਹੀ ਖਤਮ ਹੋ ਜਾਵੇਗੀ! ਮੈਂ 5 PHD ਵੀ ਕਰ ਲਵਾ, ਪਰ… ਜੇ ਮੈਂ ਪੰਜਾਬੀ ਨਹੀਂ ਬੋਲਦੀ, ਜੇ ਮੈਂ ਪੰਜਾਬੀ ਵਿੱਚ ਲਿਖਣ ਤੇ ਮਾਣ ਨਹੀਂ ਕਰਦੀ – ਤਾਂ ਮੇਰੀ ਪੜ੍ਹਾਈ ਵੀ ਬੇਕਾਰ ਹੈ! ਇਹ ਕੋਈ ਗਵਾਰਾਂ ਦੀ ਜ਼ੁਬਾਨ ਨਹੀਂ, ਇਹ ਉਹ ਭਾਸ਼ਾ ਹੈ ਜੋ ਹਜ਼ਾਰਾਂ ਸਾਲਾਂ ਤਕ ਤਰੀਖ਼ ਦੀ ਗਵਾਹ ਰਹੀ ਹੈ। ਭੁੱਲੇ ਸ਼ਾਹ, ਵਾਰਿਸ ਸ਼ਾਹ, ਬਾਬਾ ਫ਼ਰੀਦ, ਗੁਰੂ ਨਾਨਕ – ਇਹਨਾਂ ਨੇ ਪੰਜਾਬੀ ਵਿੱਚ ਲਿਖਿਆ ਸੀ, ਕੋਈ ਉਰਦੂ ਜਾਂ ਅੰਗ੍ਰੇਜੀ ਵਿੱਚ ਨਹੀਂ! ਇਹ ਉਹ ਜ਼ੁਬਾਨ ਹੈ ਜਿਸਨੇ ਦਿਲਾਂ ਨੂੰ ਜੋੜਿਆ, ਇਨਸਾਨ ਨੂੰ ਇਨਸਾਨ ਬਣਾਇਆ! ਪਰ ਮਾਨਸਿਕ ਪੰਜਾਬੀ ਗ਼ੁਲਾਮੀ ਜ਼ਹਿਨ ਨੇ ਸਾਨੂੰ ਕਿੱਥੇ ਪਹੁੰਚਾਇਆ? ਅੱਜ 2025 ਵਿੱਚ ਵੀ ਲੋਕ ਪੰਜਾਬੀ ਨੂੰ ਬਦਤਮੀਜ਼, ਬਦਤਹਜ਼ਿਬ ਤੇ ਗਵਾਰਾਂ ਦੀ ਜ਼ੁਬਾਨ ਆਖਦੇ ਹਨ। ਤੇ ਇਹ ਕਹਿਣ ਵਾਲੇ ਕੋਈ ਹੋਰ ਨਹੀਂ, ਆਪ ਪੰਜਾਬੀ ਹਨ! ਪਾਕਿਸ...

Projection is a psychological defense mechanism where individuals attribute their own thoughts, feelings, or insecurities onto others. In women, particularly in social and emotional interactions, projection often manifests through verbal aggression—backbiting, defamation, and passive-aggressive communication. Unlike physical aggression, which is more common in men, women often express their dominance or frustrations through words, using indirect but potent attacks on others' self-esteem. The irony? The person projecting often doesn’t realize they are doing it. They may genuinely believe that the negative traits they are criticizing in others belong solely to the other person, when in reality, those same traits exist within them. Psychologists have long studied social structures among women and found that competition often takes a verbal or psychological form. Evolutionary psychology suggests that, historically, men fought for status through physical dominance, while women engaged i...

Sociology teaches us that culture and religion, while often intertwined, are fundamentally distinct. Religion provides moral and spiritual guidance, while culture shapes traditions, customs, and social behaviors. In a diverse society like Pakistan, this distinction becomes particularly evident, as Islamic principles coexist with historical and cultural influences that predate the country's formation. As a Muslim, I have always been inspired by the Hadith that encourages us to fix what is wrong, no matter how small. My enthusiasm for helping others, however, has evolved over time. I have come to realize that the perception of "right" and "wrong" is deeply influenced by cultural conditioning. What is considered appropriate in one society might be unacceptable in another, and navigating these differences requires a balance of wisdom, patience, and understanding. Pakistan, established in 1947 as a homeland for Muslims, carries with it a deep historical legacy. While...